Hold the (i)Phone


This “time out” takes place at the end of the script.

Steve Jobs (Photo credit: University Chic)

<<Interrupts Daisey with a slow clap>>

<<Sarcastically>>

Bravo.  Great work.  No, truly.

Never in my life, or afterward, has someone so eloquently summed up my work.  The agony and ecstasy of…me?  As you can see, I applaud your effort.  Your idiotic effort.  And what is the point of this?

<<Tinge of anger>> 

To make me…feel bad? While you were off spewing a river of shit, I built a failing company into the most valuable business in the world.  Do you really think what you say will make a difference?  Even if half of what you said was true, do you really think that people would listen to you over me?

Consider for a second, if you have the ability, where the information on labor conditions in China, at Foxconn, came from in the first place.  Apple.  The reports we issue, checking to see if  companies follow our code of conduct…that’s where people find out about working conditions.  If we find labor violations, the supplier either fixes them or is terminated.  Conditions at our factories are better than Samsung, Lenovo, any of our competitors.

<<Noticeably angry>>

These lies you’re telling…anyone who can use goddamn Google can tell you how wrong you are.  You seem to want to live in your own world of shit… and slander.

<<Pause.  Gain composure, spoken deliberately>>

Why do you think we’re in China?  To get people angry at us?  Sorry, but no.  The supply chains in China are unrivaled.  If we were anywhere else in the world, manufacturing would grind to a halt.  We can’t come to America.  In order to make enough of a product to appease people like you, we have to rely on China.  Your kind demands that we have one, two, maybe three of the newest iPad or iPhone ready to be bought.

<<Sarcastically>>

God forbid if we run out!  All hell breaks loose.  If Apple didn’t have China, your world would end.  You would at least bitch and moan as if it was.  Nobody else can make enough Apple products that quickly.

<<Menacingly, with a touch of indignation>>

Tonight isn’t a virus.  Macs doesn’t get viruses.  This is an annoying pop-up enticing the gullible to win a new iPad, but these people aren’t gullible.  They see the lies.  It’s only a matter of time before you’re the one in agony.

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9 responses to “Hold the (i)Phone

  1. While this was a very different viewpoint than my interruption, I really enjoyed reading it and found the style and detail to mesh very well with the tone of Mike Daisey. I thought your interuption was very witty and completely in line with what Steve Jobs would have said had he commented on the script. I thought your final point, about Mac’s not getting viruses and this was just an annoying pop-up, was extremely smart and captures the point of the interruption. I thought this was extremely well-written and would love to see it in the actual performance.

  2. I agree with Meghan’s comment above, your interruption style is very consistent with the tone Mike Daisey uses throughout his monologue. You incorporate vulgarity and sarcasm which gives “Steve Jobs” a voice. A specific detail that you touch on that I thought was extremely interesting yet not particularly thought of is googling Mike Daisey and his fabrications. “Anyone” with Google could fact check Mike Daisey – I wonder why editors at “This American Life” didn’t think to use Google during their own fact checks.

  3. I really enjoyed your interruption and the way in which you gave Steve Job’s his “voice.” I think Jobs would have been very witty and sarcastic when speaking to Mike Daisy and criticizing his performance, which I thought you were right in line with. I like the detail that Alexis pointed out about your line of how anyone who can use Google can tell how wrong you (Daisy) are. I think it’s a pretty powerful line that should be extremely emphasized if this interruption were to be added to the performance, because it is really telling the audience how much of his performance is a fabrication.

  4. I really enjoyed reading this interruption and I think it would go great at the end of the performance. I can almost picture Steve Jobs walking out and saying this through your explanations of his emotions. This would be a powerful way of ending the script. People who didn’t realize the amount of fabrications there were would be taken back by a reaction from “Steve Jobs.” What could “Mike Daisy” possibly respond with after hearing “Steve Jobs” reaction to his script?

  5. This was impressive. The way that you were able to articulate the emotions and reaction of Steve Jobs was very spot on. Steve Jobs made Apple what it is today, and no one can argue that. So the way that you presented his voice, belittling Daisey and almost mocking him was very appropriate. And I feel that the placement of the interruption, or perhaps more of a closing statement, was chosen very well. You put it perfectly. Would people be more likely to listen to Daisey, or Steve Jobs, if given the chance? By waiting until the end of the performance, it would put Jobs in the power position. He lets Daisey finish, gives him the slow-clap, and effectively embarrasses him in front of the audience. Well played.

  6. I enjoyed your idea of breaking the third wall at the end of the script. When I was first thinking about how this piece could be portrayed at Bucknell, I was nervous that it would be difficult to show that it was also a critique of the piece itself, not just Apple. Your unexpected theatrical technique at the very end of the performance is a great solution.

  7. This is very well written and I think it would fit in with the tone and attitude of the play perfectly. The way you have Steve patronize Mike for criticizing the way Apple fills the consumer demand, of which Mike is a part of. The last quip about Macs not getting viruses is a fantastic parallel to draw between Mike’s criticism of Apple the company and its overall well being. This interruption gets my vote for the live performance.

  8. I thought this dialogue was hysterical. I actually laughed out loud a few times. The tone is just smug enough to convey that Jobs is above the accusations but not too snobby where I wouldn’t trust his judgement. I also think that he is the right character to end the script with. Great job.

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